Newtown, your shirt's a bit shit
Tom Lynch thought he'd tell the truth about the suburb he lives in and loves. So he made a t-shirt with one of the council flats on it and, perhaps, the greatest slogan ever:
Newtown: It's a bit shit.
I first saw the shirt being modelled by Paul at Green Land and had a chuckle. I live in Newtown and, while it's nice, it really is a bit shit. But, maybe that's why I like it?
Tom had the same thought:
"I originally did the shirt as a joke for a friend for his birthday. We have both lived in Newtown for 20 years on and off. I love Newtown," he says.
"There's been a big trend recently for Wellington's suburbs to have t-shirts designed using the name and my friend said 'Newtown really is a bit shit'. It was a bit tongue in cheek. Newtown is a bit like the rough part of the diamond," says Tom.
But not everybody gets Tom's sense of humour. Read on for the response.
Wellington City Council's communications adviser Richard MacLean said:
Whoever designed them was trying to be a bit too clever and is a bit of a plonker. There is no real reason for the shirt to be produced except someone trying to be ironic and postmodern.
And MacLean ain't the only one who didn't get the joke and decided to hit back.
David Wilcock, a Newtown resident and business owner, has come up with some t-shirt designs of his own, after fielding complaints from the Newtown community "incensed" by Mr Lynch's t-shirts proclaiming 'Newtown - it's a bit shit' which featured on the front page of The Wellingtonian three weeks ago.
The problem for David is his slogan;
Why travel the world when you can visit Newtown?
is a bit shit.
I think you meant "raison d'être"
Actually no, I think I meant exactly what I wrote, thanks very much.
Ahhh... you would say that now.
Well, if you meant exactly what you wrote then I'm afraid you're a plonker.
It should be "raison d'etre".
May wee! Joanna was taking zee piss.
Zoot alloys, Robyn is right!
The response from the Newtown Flight Centre is unknown at this time.
The Wellingtonista: It's a bit shit.
It was The Wellingtonian from Thursday actually. And I was totally supposed to write it this weekend. Hadyn: He's a bit lazy.
Yes, Hadyn's article is about this week's response in the Wellingtonian, and the rather twee counter-T-shirt, rather than the original story.
Any discussion of this should mention the website Birmingham: it's not shit, who's very denial emphasises the fact that yes, Brum really is a bit shit. Likewise, the original Newtown t-shirt implies that while Newtown is a bit rough around the edges, that's the way the wearer likes it. Sure, it has some nice heritage buildings and some great independent shops, but Newtownians don't want it gussied up too much to become the Thorndon of the south. Is it really that hard to get?
Also check out the other of David's t-shirt designs, worn backwards by the model on the right. You can't read all the text in this photo, but it says:
LONDON
PARIS
NEW YORK
NEWTOWN
That's right - they're comparing a funky Wellington suburb to three fuck-off metropolises, two of which have been the target of major terrorist attacks in recent years. Yeah, that's just what Newtown needs.
The "It's a bit shit" slogan is funny because it's true. Trying to pretend that Newtown is a major city is bizarre, if not severely deluded.
If anything, it should refer to neighbourhoods rather than whole cities. Perhaps:
SHOREDITCH
RUE OBERKAMPF
LOWER EAST SIDE
NEWTOWN
Y'know, rapidly gentrifying places where you can get an ironic designer t-shirt, decent coffee, ethnic food, retro furniture and the shit kicked out of you if you're not careful.
Ah, the Otara design in sweatshirt form is used as the icon for Te Papa's Tangata o le Moana exhibit.
If not a direct homage to the original Otara design, I wouldn't be surprised if the Te Papa promos for Tangata o le Moana had somehow influenced the Newtown t-shirt designer.
It's still a bit shit, though.
Wasn't there some scandal about that photo? They reshot it because they couldn't get rights to the original or something?
Oh and I've got an REM tour tshirt that says:
LONDON
NEW YORK
TOKYO
SYDNEY
NEW PLYMOUTH
All these lists just make me think of an old ad for a Barbie that came with an outfit that transformed into three outfits, one of which was also a purse for you.
And there's this famous one from 1979:
New York, London, Paris, Munich - everyone talk about pop muzik!
(Which may have influenced the Otara t-shirt, which was made in 1981)
I think Hadyn should ask Paul from Green Land if he was the friend Tom designed the original "it's a bit shit" shirt for...!
"Wellington: It's a bit small"
Hadyn knew. He's just a bit slow
Really? It's possible to buy a t-shirt for as little as $55? Who knew?
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