the wellingtonista

Nun-chucks and riots and tasers, Oh My!

Submitted by Hadyn on Fri, 2008-08-22 12:21.

Yesterday at 4pm a nun-chuck wielding shoplifter (no seriously) held police at bay, created a huge crowd to gather in Manners Mall, and caused a mini-riot.

First of all, nun-chucks. In terms of a weapon to pull out while being arrested, nun-chucks are equal parts "WTF" and "Napoleon Dynamite".

Second of all, where are the Jpegs? Fair enough it sounds like you'd have to be an intrepid photographer to brave the "youth gangs" who were fighting with "anyone who looked at them the wrong way". But still it sounds like a spectacle, with the gathered masses apparently calling for the police to "taser him".

llew's picture

Someone should write a sonnet about it.

Robyn's picture

Hanging with the goths in Manners Mall -
a scuffle in the Loaded clothing shop
A shoplifter, so 111 was called
but even still the ruckus didn't stop.
Nunchakus were brandished, ninja style.
The shop staff locked themselves out in the back
I hadn't had some biff now for a while,
so I turned 'round and gave some guy a whack.
A Strathmore chick did kick me in the nuts.
I fell down hard and I began to wail.
My hardcore gangsta plan ran out of luck,
as the po'liceman, he took me off to jail.
I've vowed to never go out after dark.
It's so much safer here in Churton Park.

stephen clover's picture

Iambic pentameter FAIL :p
But otherwise, WIN x

Robyn's picture

Hey, I made an effort to get it to scan! It's a little clunky in places, but I don't think it's tooooo bad! :D

It's the traditional Elizabethan pronunciation of "nunchakus" - three syllables.

Robyn's picture

If by "Elizabethan" you mean Japanese, then, yes. Yes, it is.

This reminds me of a boy at my primary school who said that they were called "nun chucks" because "you chuck them at nuns".

llew's picture

Catholic primary school?

Good work with the sonnet!

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