The Gryphon’s pro­duc­tion of Ser­i­al Killers is a peri­od piece set in the days when instead of say­ing “YouTube” we said “net­work tele­vi­sion,” and instead of bemoan­ing “real­i­ty TV” and its effects on the unwashed-at-large, we bemoaned “soap operas” and their see above. One assumes it’s intend­ed as ever­green com­men­tary upon the ear­ly 2000s when the play was writ­ten, though char­ac­ters tote 2012-era lap­tops while riff­ing at length on shows like Wiseguy (1980s) and Gilli­gan’s Island (turn of the pri­or cen­tu­ry?), so let us just move for­ward under best assump­tions.

The play’s divid­ed into two areas: the soap-opera world, in which every turn her­alds a new rev­e­la­tion to be deliv­ered via boom­ing the­atri­cal ges­ture; and the “real world,” in which every turn her­alds a fair­ly minor advance­ment of the play’s myr­i­ad plot threads, to be deliv­ered via see above. It’s in the soap-opera por­tions that the actors are best pitched. Here Alan Carabot­t’s wrought ges­tic­u­la­tions and sten­to­ri­an deliv­ery breathe life into inten­tion­al­ly pur­ple wads of expo­si­tion, while Ange Fitzhar­ris’ sex-Bam­bi daffi­ness sits per­fect­ly along­side the out­sized agents of this real­i­ty-twice-removed; where­as down­stage she some­times seems like the only one in on the joke.

Because it’s when the actors come down into “real­i­ty” that the show’s true dimen­sions reveal them­selves. Ser­i­al Killers’ plot con­cerns the writ­ers of a long-run­ning New Zealand med­ical melo­dra­ma, and the trou­ble that ensues when a life­time star is writ­ten off the show. Penned by Out­ra­geous For­tune co-cre­ator and Short­land Street writers’-table vet­er­an James Grif­fin, the play is “meta” from back when the word we used was “post­mod­ern,” a show-with­in-a-show shaped by the dra­ma-out­side-the-dra­ma. One doc­tor, we’re told, “is a fic­tion­al char­ac­ter; fic­tion­al char­ac­ters don’t mas­tur­bate.” But giv­en that we’re watch­ing actors play­ing writ­ers play­ing actors play­ing char­ac­ters for the pur­pos­es of telling audi­ences that audi­ences like char­ac­ters who come out of writ­ers feud­ing with actors, some­one’s cer­tain­ly rub­bing one out on our time.

Ser­i­al Killers wrings its best dra­mat­ic ten­sion from the ques­tion: who is writ­ing who? All the play’s char­ac­ters have their oncreen alter-egos, played as out­sized ver­sions of the writ­ers them­selves; all except Andrew, the uppi­ty actor whose char­ac­ter is due to be writ­ten off the show after sleep­ing with the wrong per­son. (Every devel­op­ment in Ser­i­al Killers traces back to a vari­a­tion on this theme). As his char­ac­ter, Dr Gilli­gan, lies comatose onscreen, Andrew (Geoff Sim­mons) takes it upon him­self to men­ace the scriptwrit­ers with a gun, demand­ing his star role be rein­stat­ed. After an hour’s time onstage in which noth­ing much hap­pens and peo­ple talk at length about it, the sec­ond half of the pro­ceed­ings then take the form of a hostage dra­ma, in which noth­ing much hap­pens and peo­ple talk at length about it and one of them some­times scratch­es his head with a gun.

Andrew/Gilligan thus becomes the engi­neer of the show’s “real” dra­ma: a tul­pa con­jured by mad monks, the writ­ers’ neu­rot­ic hyper­sex­u­al­i­ty made neu­rot­ic, hyper-sex­u­al­ized flesh. He’s an effec­tive shad­ow not just for head writer Alan (David Cox, who inhab­its Alan well but plays his char­ac­ter arc as a jour­ney from “world-weary res­ig­na­tion” to “world-weary res­ig­na­tion with a ban­dage over his ear”), but for the play’s entire cast. As an audi­ence, we can see that Andrew clear­ly has no pow­er: the hand­some, affa­ble Sim­mons plays him as a shriek­ing twit, low-sta­tus even when he’s threat­en­ing oth­er char­ac­ters’ lives, for­ev­er going out of his way to pro­vide them with oppor­tu­ni­ties to turn the tables. Their stead­fast refusal to do so gives away the lie: these writ­ers may bemoan their own abil­i­ty to shape a com­pelling nar­ra­tive, but if they’re caught in a bona-fide plot, damn if any­one’s going to drop out before the plot resolves itself.

Anoth­er thing that’s hap­pened between Ser­i­al Killers’ pre­miere run and the present-day is the pro­lif­er­a­tion of real­i­ty-TV-inspired mock­u­men­taries such as The Office. One recur­ring joke on that show’s Amer­i­can incar­na­tion had pro­tag­o­nist Michael Scott con­vinced of his tal­ent for improv, for­ev­er ruin­ing sketch­es by resort­ing to the car­di­nal sin of pulling a gun onstage. Thanks to Car­rell, it’s now fair­ly com­mon knowl­edge that, if you’re not Brett Rat­ner and this ain’t Rush Hour, “dude pulls a gun on them” is the epit­o­me of lazi­ness as rever­sals go. But it’s all Andrew has, and so it’s all we have.

And it’s not enough. Ser­i­al Killers is a fair­ly unpleas­ant lit­tle piece, a bil­ious nugget of cal­ci­fied resent­ment with noth­ing nice to say about any­thing and too many words in which to say it. Ania Upstill does her lev­el best with the char­ac­ter of Simone Sap­phique, who exists because Ser­i­al Killers con­sid­ers the notion of a gay woman to be inher­ent­ly fun­ny. The clos­est any­one comes to pro­fun­di­ty is in observ­ing that both dra­mas and human lives end even­tu­al­ly, and that “that’s alright.” Giv­en that this obser­va­tion comes as the actors are suit­ing up for final cur­tain, “that’s alright” is the play’s rarest of under­state­ments.

And here’s where the pit­falls of under­tak­ing an act of metafic­tion become hard to nav­i­gate. When a play’s cast is com­prised entire­ly of peo­ple whose job it is to know good writ­ing from bad, the lat­ter becomes dou­bly galling to sit through. “It’s an unsat­is­fac­to­ry plot twist,” Alan says of Andrew’s script idea: “Not prop­er­ly set up, con­trived just to get me going.” It’s hard to be sure which of Ser­i­al Killers’ unmo­ti­vat­ed devel­op­ments or irrel­e­vant bouts of off­stage wack­i­ness would dan­gle heav­i­est from this par­tic­u­lar petard. “There’s no dra­ma!” Alan lat­er roars, doing lit­tle to inter­rupt the rou­tine.

There’s sev­er­al lengthy riffs on the pains of hav­ing to deal with bad actors, which is just court­ing dis­as­ter. The Gryphon play­ers inhab­it their char­ac­ters as best they can, but none appear to have stud­ied this sort of fast-paced, jab-and-riposte dia­logue per­formed at the appro­pri­ate tem­po. Every line is pre­ced­ed by a pause for thought, deliv­ered at a state­ly, Pin­ter­ian pace, accom­pa­nied by copi­ous mug­ging and an elbow-to-the-gut pause for laughs. (Per­haps the char­ac­ters were too busy look­ing down their noses at tele­vi­sion to take note of how a West Wing or Gilmore Girls turns snap­py dia­logue into win­ning rhythm).

This is why the show’s show-with­in-a-show por­tions are its best. Writ­ers, one char­ac­ter sug­gests, always to pre­fer to write about writ­ing; sim­i­lar­ly, time and again we’ve seen how many local actors, giv­en the chance, pre­fer to pan­tomime the act of act­ing: lamp­shad­ing their own the­atri­cal excess­es at the expense of any inter­nal­ized pow­er. Here they’re giv­en a raised stage on which to strut, while the bulk of the onstage action takes place at ground-lev­el: much time is spent with char­ac­ters sat around a huge “Table of Pain,” low­er­ing their sta­tus fur­ther and cre­at­ing stag­ing dilem­mas that draw us out of this real­i­ty. Many of the play’s piv­otal lines are deliv­ered by char­ac­ters with their backs to the audi­ence, their fury sucked up by that big table, the recip­i­ents of their ire equal­ly blocked off from view­ers.

Able play­wrights such as Mar­tin Crimp, or the Davids Mamet and Rabe, have wrung pitch-per­fect black com­e­dy from the world of behind-the-scenes mis­an­thropy; even their direct-to-video cousin, Neil LaBute, man­ages the odd misog­y­nist zinger. But these writ­ers’ works tend to run lit­tle over half Ser­i­al Killers’ time, and to take audi­ences and char­ac­ters alike a lot fur­ther while they’re doing it. Griffin’s play estab­lish­es a uni­verse in which every­one is smarter than soap operas, then spends two hours con­grat­u­lat­ing us for being com­plic­it in this judge­ment. It’s a play for those who love to pro­claim shows like Short­land Street a “guilty plea­sure;” but if this was Griffin’s way of excis­ing any lin­ger­ing ambiva­lence toward the show, the pro­duc­tion’s few authen­tic comedic moments are much bet­ter suit­ed to tak­ing on that most tired of man­tles.

Ser­i­al Killers by James Grif­fin, direct­ed by Iona Ander­son at Gryphon The­atre until 29 Sept