As a fly, I obviously have some distasteful habits, and I am sometimes accused of buzzing too close to pretension or political bias. Well, I’m hardly going to change the habits of a lifetime, but just this once here’s a mystery bar without a hint of pretension.

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No burlesque dancers or pan-Mediterranean tapas here, mate! It’s beery, blokey and beefy, and if there’s any pretence about it, it’s that it’s pretending to be somewhere else: the South Island backblocks, from the looks of things.

So, what and where is it?