Mo’ Ho?

Some have accused Mojo of becoming Wellington’s answer to Starbucks, but according to one blogger, maybe they’re more like Hooters. Apparently, “All the female staff have their shirts buttoned down to the lowest feasible button meaning that any movement will expose a little more breast than your average cafe.” Is this a new moral low for coffee marketing? Such a major incident required fearless investigative reporting, so a fly was dispatched to Mojo to find out.

After some thorough (but discreet and respectful, of course) research, I had to conclude that there’s not much to get excited about. The female staff all had precisely one button undone, and while it’s true that their uniforms had top buttons that were far lower than the males’, the results were hardly exploitative or titillating. There was perhaps the occasional glimpse of decolletage, but no more so than one would commonly encounter with casual clothing in warm weather, and certainly not enough to get Mark Prebble hot under the collar. The Masked Barfly is glad that a respected brand has not sunk to sleazy tactics, while also being perhaps just a tad disappointed.

Another Mojo branch has taken a different tack when it comes to promoting their business. Mojo Bond St advertises a speciality of the house called a “Mojo Mojito”. This fly considers it something of an acquired taste, mixing as it does iced espresso, limes, mint and soda. Certainly refreshing, while giving one’s wings a bit more buzz, but what’s this? No rum?! That’s not a mojito where I come from. Perhaps we could convince them to add a splash of Havana Club, and then things could be getting interesting.

And in further coffee news, the much-loved but grammatically dubious Peoples (sic) Coffee is expanding from their Newtownista stronghold to take on the café barons of Cuba St. Their new outlet will be tucked just off the main drag in Garrett St, opposite what was once Wino Park and is now Emo Park. After all, gourmets, fabric lovers, swarming teens, sauna-goers and gamblers all need their fix of ethical caffeine, too.